The Art of Reconstruction
by tenrousei-kuroi
Summary: The threat of the Dark Lord looms greater than ever, and Sirius decides his brother will remain safe and unbranded, whether he wants it or not. Rating is for language and some violence later on. Nothing too outrageous.
1. Legal Kidnapping

**Summary:** Sirius has decided his brother will not be joining the Death Eaters, or doing anything else his parents want, and if he has to physically force Regulus to go along with his plan, he will.

**Story Notes: **This is another request from a friend of mine, who's probably at the very moment I post this opening a lovely e-mail from me containing the first chapter of this story. I'm so glad most everyone I know asks me to write them Regulus fics; it give me an excuse to continue fixating . although lately I have been delving into the Lestrange brothers and some Barty Crouch Jr. stuff oddly enough. I don't think Rodolphus and Rabastan will ever be able to usurp the Black brothers' place in my heart, though.

And it would probably take the almighty hand of god to make me write something focusing on characters from Harry's generation. Those little fuckers have too much canonical personality, just…too much.

**Pairings:** None? I'll probably continue my trend of turning James and Lily into best friends but nothing more…I alter that boy's character like no other and still I don't think he's good enough for her *laughs* Or maybe I just like the excuse to throw in a happy, single girl…Also I promise this story will _not_ drift into Sirius/Regulus territory. Promise. I know my track record makes that difficult to believe but just trust me. Really.

**Side notes:** I promised myself I wouldn't start any more multi-chaptered…things until I was completely done (or at least had a better handle on) _Audentes._ Buuuut then this happened. No seriously, it just happened.

Onwards.

* * *

"What?" Sirius asked roughly. "Whatever it is just say it, Remus."

Remus smiled a little. "Don't get like that," he implored. "I was just wanting to warn you; this is a serious amount of responsibility you're going to take on now, and I want to make sure you know full well what it is you're getting into."

Sirius stopped walking and raised an eyebrow. Somewhere over his shoulder a shop's neon sign flickered on: a sign that night was creeping up. "You would have me leave him behind there? You honestly think I can't handle my own little brother?"

Remus, too, stopped walking. "No, not at all," he insisted. "I'm not trying to convince you not to do this, more so I just want to make sure you plan on…you know, giving this your all."

"Remus…"

Remus held up his hands in defense. "I'm not saying you're irresponsible, just that you may be biting off more than you can chew. Regulus is _damaged_, Sirius, and you're not so perfectly functional yourself, you know. I just don't want this to end badly."

"I'm going to go back and get him."

Remus nodded in agreement. The two started to walk again. It was minutes before Remus gathered his wits to speak again.

"We've still got a year of school left. You're going to be very busy."

"So will he, but we'll make do, Remus."

Remus tugged at his collar, regretting his choice to wear such a warm shirt when summer was clearly coming early. "Have you even considered how hard your parents are going to fight you on this, Sirius, not to mention Regulus?"

"I'm doing what is right," Sirius said to the pavement.

Remus also trained his eyes to the ground. Uncomfortable conversations like this, especially with Sirius of all people, had never been his forte.

"I've no doubt you could physically remove Regulus from that house, Sirius, but if your parents pursue you legally… not to mention your brother won't make it any easier on you if he's as far gone as you describe."

"My parents won't fight me, Remus. Trust me."

Remus absent mindedly scratched at his arm. His pace unconsciously slowed. "You seem so certain…"

Sirius smiled smugly. "If they start any commotion the authorities will get involved. All the time in the world wouldn't be enough for my parents to hide the myriad of illicit Dark materials they have in that house. They know if they make any legal moves they'll regret it."

Remus scoffed. "You're trying to convince me that the _Blacks_ of all people couldn't stave off the Ministry with a little gold?"

They turned a corner. Sirius's apartment was just down the road.

"Believe me, there are limits to what even my family can do, especially against someone like me attacking from the inside out. Plus I think I have a chance of getting Regulus to tell them he only wants to visit me for some time this summer. Then school starts. Then after that he visits me again and I just never give him back. I'm his brother; it'd be hard to bring up charges against me."

"For kidnapping, maybe," Remus consented. "But I imagine it would be quite easy to haul you off to Azkaban for performing the Imperius Curse on your thirteen year old brother because that is the _only_ way you are going to get him to say anything of the sort!"

Sirius laughed abruptly. "I can get ahold of Regulus, Remus. Have some faith in me."

"Okay," Remus promised. "I'll try. But what I was alluding to before is still a concern, Sirius. Fixing Regulus is going to be difficult. You're going to have to give this one your all. You can't just get bored or frustrated halfway through and give up. It's going to be hard, and you've got to be committed, all right?"

Sirius pretended to be outraged. "You dare doubt my conviction, Moony?" he demanded while fishing his apartment keys from the pocket of his jeans.

"Har, har. I'm serious here, Sirius. I'm not a child psychologist, but even I can tell you that Regulus is going to need a _lot_ of attention, and you've got your own life to worry about."

Sirius unlocked his front door and stepped inside, Remus close behind. "This is the first decently altruistic thing I've done with my life, don't try to talk me out of it."

Remus slapped Sirius lightly on the back and then made his way into the kitchen, flicking on lights as he went. "I wouldn't dream of it, but this whole situation is dependent on you, Sirius. Regulus is _not_ going to give you a lot of help, you know."

"Yeah," Sirius sighed. "I know, but it will be worth it in the end."

"Sirius?" Remus asked cautiously a moment later as he started to sift through the copious amounts of alcohol in the cupboard.

"Mhm?" Sirius asked curiously. He had been hoping this particular conversation had ended, but apparently Remus wasn't finished yet.

"You are…okay, please don't take this the wrong way but…you are doing this _for_ Regulus, right?"

"As opposed to what?" Sirius asked slowly.

"As opposed to…say, wanting to have a brother who's a carbon copy of you, wanting to have control over someone else, or even some pathological need to win against your parents by, I don't know, like _stealing_ their prize possession from them: their Regulus." When he finished, Remus looked to Sirius with a bit of apprehension in his eyes, praying Sirius wouldn't explode on him.

Sirius was pouring himself a glass of wine. With a heavy sigh he sat down at the table. Tentatively, Remus joined him.

"Okay you wanted an answer, well, I'll give you one. You want to know why I want this so badly? Here, this is why." Sirius held up his hand to the light to illuminate the thin scar on the back of his wrist. Remus had seen it many times but had never asked how Sirius had gotten it. He had had it at least since Remus met him.

"This," Sirius explained carefully in between sips of purple wine, "is a scar I got from a particularly nasty curse that jettisoned out of my mother's old wand. It was the one she kept in the attic and never used. Regulus had been messing with it. He was eight; I was eleven."

"How'd you get hit? Did he point the wand at you?"

Sirius shook his head quickly. "No, no, you idiot, I found him and leaped forward just in time to get _him_ out of the way. I got hit with the tail end of the curse instead. He scared me so badly. I was a while yelling at him before I remembered I was injured, but there was not much anyone could do anyway but stop the bleeding. The scar wouldn't fade because it was a curse and not a normal wound, but I didn't mind. I was just happy Reggie hadn't gotten hit."

"I'm waiting for you to tie this into what we were talking about."

"Getting to that, Remus," Sirius downed the rest of his glass. "I guess what I'm trying to get across is that, when I asked him why in the hell he'd been messing around alone up in the attic, where there were a hundred dangerous things, he said he'd been trying to get my attention."

"Your attention?"

Sirius looked his friend straight in the eye and nodded. "Yeah. I'd been pretty preoccupied packing for Hogwarts, you see, and I think I'd been ignoring him. He was wanting me to pay attention to him, and he didn't want me to leave. He even crawled into my bed that night. I didn't have the heart to kick him out."

"Oh," said Remus, sitting back. "I get it now, yeah."

Sirius smiled. "Sometimes I have trouble buying that that hate-filled little fucker who skulks around the school hallways sneering at Muggle-borns and cursing my name is really the same boy and not some hideously construed doppelganger."

"Well then, Sirius," said Remus raising his own wine glass to toast. "Then I wish you all the luck in the world. And believe me, you're going to need it to get Regulus to leave that mansion you call Grimmauld Place to come and live _here._"

"Hey! I'm young and on a bit of a fixed income, give me a break! It's not that small!"

Remus rolled his eyes. "Size isn't that much of an issue. Let's just hope your brother secretly _adores_ cleaning."

"Next weekend I'm hanging out with James."

ﯕⱤﯕⱤﯕⱤ

Despite his earlier confidence when talking with Remus, Sirius still arrived at his former home carrying a little more anxiety than he would have liked. He could do this, God dammit. He knocked lightly on the door and heard an instant commotion behind it.

Kreacher, the unsightly little house elf, opened the door and fixed him with a scrutinizing stare. "Master Sirius," he said finally and after some consideration. "Back to apologize or wanting something?"

"I wish to speak with my brother, Kreacher," Sirius responded coolly. Kreacher, however, called for Sirius's parents, and Sirius immediately found himself grateful that he had dressed to the nines that day. His proper robes and combed hair should at least endear him to his parents somewhat, or else nothing would.

His mother arrived on the threshold.

"Mother," Sirius inclined his head a little.

She stared at him dully, her sunken eyes rife with judgment, and then folded her arms, unimpressed. "And what have we here?" Walburga Black asked coldly, pushing her dark hair behind her ear. "A blood traitor come crawling back to beg for forgiveness?"

Sirius took a deep breath. "No—" he began.

Ms. Black made to close the door in his face.

"Wait, Mum!" he called. She paused, glaring, as if to demand he explain himself quickly.

Sirius took the hint. "I wanted to talk with Reg, if I can. It's important," he said as fast as he could.

Walburga's brown eyes narrowed dangerously. "I don't know what business you think you have with my son, but I assure you that he is too busy to speak with the likes of you." She spun on her heel and marched off into the dining room, obviously expecting Kreacher to close to door behind her, but Sirius was too fast. He shouldered his way inside and followed his now irate mother.

"Please," he called. "Mother."

She whirled around indignantly. "I am not your mother," she whispered. "You are not _my_ child, you are someone else's monstrosity, not get out of my house before I make you." Her words were venomous but with a tentative amount of optimism Sirius noted that there was not nearly as much effort behind it all as there had been the night he had stormed out—seemingly for good. Her voice was barely more than a whisper, and a tired one at that.

"I'm sorry to disappoint you so, Mother, but my blood does mean enough to me that I visit my younger brother on occasion."

"Get out," she repeated wearily, but made no move to access her wand. Sirius fidgeted. A part of him wished that his mother would start screaming again like he was so used to. He felt uncomfortable with theses subtle reminders that she did, somewhere, care about him at least a little. These signs that she was confused and tired, like a real human being might be. "I don't want you here."

"All right, I'll leave soon. Just let me see Regulus. I need to at least wish him a happy birthday."

"His birthday is not for another eight days, Sirius," Walburga said dryly.

"Honestly? I thought it would take a week of me coming to badger you just to get you or Father to let me in the house."

"You're lucky your father isn't here right now, you sorry Muggle-lover. He'd beat you if he could get his hands on you."

"Your husband is my father but you are not my mother? How could you not tell me, Ms. Black? After all these years! I must say though, that it is admirable of you to still try and make such an unfaithful marriage last!"

His mother reached forward and struck him hard on the arm. Then she stormed off in the general direction of the drawing room, yelling over her shoulder, "You have _five minutes_ you ungrateful, shameful creature. Then I throw you out in pieces."

So, thought Sirius, this was one of her better days where those tiny rays of humanity shined through her horrible blackened heart. He imagined he probably did have only five minutes or so before that hideous Black monster took hold again and she really did come at him raving and firing hexes.

Quickly, he jogged up the stairs. He resisted all urges to step foot inside his old bedroom for fear that he'd find it dismantled and torn apart…or even worse; untouched and preserved. He wasn't sure he could take any more vague hints that his family didn't want him dead so much as he was comfortable believing, even if all semblances of decency and kindness were on a purely subconscious level.

He knocked on Regulus's bedroom door, hoping he was inside and at the same time oddly nervous. Nervous, to talk to a thirteen year old? Get a grip, he told himself.

A very confused Regulus Black opened the door a moment later. Who on earth would be knocking inside his own house? When he saw Sirius, however, he narrowed his eyes immediately and scowled. "Fuck off," he spat, turning around and slamming the door behind him. Sirius caught it, though, just before it closed and pushed his way into Regulus's room.

"Hold up there," he said, grabbing Regulus by the arm.

Regulus spun around indignantly and punched his brother as hard as he could in the stomach with his free hand. Sirius held on, though, and soon seized Regulus's other arm by the wrist. "Get _off_ of me," his brother snapped.

"Calm down, I've just spoken to Mother, and she said I could come and talk to you," Sirius said quickly, trying to deter his brother from yelling for their parent.

"Mother must still be loopy on the drugs that had her recovering from that headcold she had. There is no other way she'd let a freak like you back into the house!" Regulus kicked at Sirius's legs.

"Well I'm here now, and you're going to listen to me."

Regulus jerked in his grip. "Get _out_ of my room you Blood-Fucking-Traitor! Go back to your little Mudblood friends and never darken our doorstep again!"

"Regulus, calm down—"

"What?" he shrieked, still thrashing. "Was one dramatic departure not enough for the attention hungry Gryffindor? Need to come crawling back home just so you can triumphantly leave again?"

"Be quiet," Sirius yanked his brother towards him. Their age difference and Regulus's slighter body build let him overpower the younger easily, but Regulus was still yelling.

"I'll be leaving in just a moment," Sirius said after finally muffling Regulus's voice.

"Then why did you come back anyway? Get out of here, I don't want you in my room!" was Regulus's answer when Sirius allowed him to speak.

"You're going to be coming with me."

Regulus froze. Slowly, Sirius released him and stepped back a bit. Regulus was no longer seething; instead he looked almost violently incredulous. How many times had he heard that phrase _you're NOT going to be coming with me_ uttered by the very same person who stood before him now? _You're not going to be coming with me to school this year; I'm leaving for James's and you're not going to be coming with me. _How unreal it was now to hear it phrased in the positive for once. Regulus's brain almost couldn't comprehend it entirely. He was silent for a long moment, and then:

"Go fuck yourself, Sirius."

Sirius wasn't sure if Regulus was just being his normal, hateful self or if his trust issues were starting to show through. Either way, his language was appalling.

"Don't you speak to me like that," Sirius took out his wand. "Now I don't have time to address your attitude fully right now because we really do need to go if we want dinner at any reasonable hour of the evening. So grab your bag and let's go."

"I'm not going anywhere with you, you cunting son of a bitch! I don't know what you're playing at, suddenly pretending like you want _me _around but you can just take this scheme of yours and shove it up your—" he cut off abruptly when Sirius's wandpoint connected sharply with his throat. Sirius murmured a series of spells under his breath.

"I said _calm down,_" he repeated. "Now let's try this again. Grab your bag…"

Regulus glared daggers at him, unhappy with having his voice so surely silenced. Sirius pointed again to where Regulus's travel and book bag lay partway underneath his bed. "You're coming to stay with me for the summer, Regulus. I'll make sure you get back to school with me safely," he said calmly as Regulus _finally_ leaned down and picked up his bag. Fuming, he placed it over his shoulder.

"Good. Now I'm going to give you your voice back, and you're going to go downstairs with me and tell Mother that you're visiting me for the summer. I'm sure she'll be glad to have you out of her hair for a while," Sirius said, waving his wand once.

"Why should I go anywhere with you?" Regulus demanded softly. Sirius thanked the gods he wasn't shouting again.

"Because you're bored out of your mind in this house with only Mum and Dad and Kreacher for company, you haven't been outside in days, and as much as you hate to admit it, Father scares you."

"I don't know what you're talking about. _My_ parents love me. You were the one who fucked up too much."

Sirius said, laughing, "Lie all you want, but your long sleeved sweater you wear in this overheated house in the middle of _June_ betrays you. Father hits hard."

"Just because you were always too much of a crybaby to handle a little discipline doesn't mean I am," Regulus said. He did seem a little unsure of himself, though.

"It's only discipline if it is implemented in some way to help you," Sirius regurgitated some of the last minute advice Remus had spewed at him the previous night. "Now let me give you the run down. You can either come home with me now, or I can go home alone and send my very own owl to the Ministry with details of just how well Daddy _disciplined _us both and then they will _take _you away. I guess that pretty much lays out your final set of options: a traumatizing trial and then a foster home, or me. But now is not the time to discuss this. Let's go."

"You're a manipulative bastard," said Regulus, hanging his head. "And I _hate_ you. I wish you had just gone for good."

What was he supposed to do now? Regulus seemed to be switching gears and a small amount of the resentment and loneliness he hid under his mask of anger was attempting to shine through. Gently Sirius led Regulus out of the room, down the hall, and then down the stairs. He pushed all of the calming magic he could onto his little brother as they walked, in an effort to keep things going so smoothly.

In part Sirius felt vindicated. He had always suspected, a little guiltily, actually, that a large part of Regulus had wanted nothing more than to run away with him earlier that year, but that copious amounts of pride and confusion had stopped him from asking. Regulus could act like he was being forced and blackmailed all he wanted, but in truth he was still coming with Sirius, and that, at least, was a positive sign. He could fix his Regulus, he could.

Their mother was waiting in the kitchen again. Dazedly, she looked up at her two sons as they approached.

Sirius prayed.

"Mother," said Regulus politely. "I—I wish to go for a while with Sirius. To visit…him. At his apartment in East London. …For the summer. So you and Father can relax and—and..."

"And what of school?"

Sirius's heart leaped. "I will make sure he gets there. I am going back, too, after all."

"Ah, yes, your final year."

Sirius nodded.

From her seat at the kitchen table Walburga studied the two of them intently. Sirius was sure she was weighing her hatred of Sirius against her love of Regulus and how much she hated to see her husband behave towards him in the awful manner he did.

"I will inform your father," she said. She looked sharply at Sirius. "The Blood Traitor's money is as good as anyone's these days, I suppose; he will buy you your school supplies at the end of August."

"Th—thank you, Mother," Regulus stammered. "I will write you often."

"Get out. Orion was due home ten minutes ago."

ﯕⱤﯕⱤﯕⱤ

When they arrived at Sirius's home, he half expected Regulus to try and bolt, or at least to resume his yelling. Sirius kept a tight grip on his brother's upper arm and held his breath as he led him inside.

The interior of the apartment was dark, and against his better judgment, Sirius left Regulus's side in order to switch on some lights. With the entryway illuminated, he turned back around to look at the youngest Black.

"All right, I think—" he began, but with a huff and a glare, Regulus stormed past him and down the hall. Obviously looking for which room would be his, he started to visibly shake when he only encountered one option. Sirius's bedroom was very large given that it was situated in a ground level flat, but it was still only one bedroom.

Sirius came up behind Regulus. "Reg…" he said.

"Where am I supposed to stay exactly?" demanded Regulus, turning around to glare at Sirius.

Sirius was silent.

"I am _not_ sharing a room with you!" No way in hell would he give up his privacy like this. It was annoying enough that Sirius had come barging back in on his life like he had, and now he expected them to just cuddle up together like Regulus was still six years old?

"Regulus—"

"I _like_ my privacy. I'm not…this—no!"

Again Regulus stomped off, this time into the living room. He threw his bag onto the coffee table and flung himself down onto the couch.

"Are you really going to do this?" Sirius asked him quietly. "You'd rather sleep on the _sofa_ than with me? It's not like we can't fit a second bed into my room sometime this week, you know."

"It doesn't matter," Regulus griped. "One bed or two…_you're_ still there."

Sirius couldn't help but feel stung. For a while he'd tried to convince himself that he didn't care what anyone in his family thought of him, but he'd lost that battle. He _did_ care what Regulus thought. Something had changed between them since the days when Regulus had followed him everywhere and called him his Nii-san, and it couldn't all be blamed on the younger. Sirius had some responsibility for their decayed relationship as well, and he couldn't remember ever wanting something so badly in his life as he wanted right now to mend the bridge between him and his brother.

And perhaps there was a bit of pride involved there as well. His parents, his cousins…he felt no burden to save them. He hardly knew most of them anyway and his parents were _not_ his responsibility. Regulus, on the other hand, Regulus was his and he was just as great an influence on his brother as were Walburga and Orion. Leaving him behind, that just screamed of cowardice, and would kindly inform Regulus that he was not worth Sirius's time.

No, Sirius would not fail in this venture.

"Well that's something you'll probably need to get over, Regulus," Sirius said. "As you live with me now, you're probably going to be seeing me around a lot."

Regulus swung his feet up onto the couch, shoes and all, and laid back. He was far from relaxed, however; his muscles were still tense and his arms folded. "What?" he scoffed. "I don't _live_ with you. I'm just here for the summer. I'm visiting. So Mother and Father can have some time alone."

Sirius sat down on the coffee table and tried to make eye contact with his brother.

"Now you know that's not true. You're not ever going back to Grimmauld Place, Regulus. Not for any length of time. I can't let you stay in that environment, and so you live with me now."

Regulus didn't answer, though he seemed to be thinking frantically of something crushing to say.

Sirius continued calmly, "and somewhere in that head of yours, I know you're glad I came to get you. You can deny it all you want, but I know you've missed me as much as I've missed you these past few months." But that was wrong. Sirius and Regulus had been separated now for several years, even before Sirius had left.

"Don't give me any of that shit," Regulus snapped. "You don't miss anything. You're just a control freak; you just want to make me miserable. You can't leave me alone because you just _have_ to be the center of attention…_always._"

Sirius leaned forward. "Regulus, please, this isn't about me. I got a little caught up in discovering myself these past few years and our relationship suffered because of that. I never wanted it to get this way, I just didn't know what to say. And I absolutely did not want to leave you behind when I left for James's, I just couldn't go dragging you off like that when I wasn't stable myself. I had to wait, don't you see? Until I had a place of my own like this, and…" he paused, wondering what on earth he could say. Part of Regulus wanted to be with his brother, why couldn't he just admit that? "I never wanted you to feel like you'd been replaced, you know. Not ever."

His words certainly got to Regulus, but not in the way he had hoped. Regulus rolled over to face away from Sirius. In an absolutely dead voice he said only, "Leave me alone, you traitor."

Sirius blinked. He started to reach for Regulus's shoulder, but stopped himself. Maybe he shouldn't push too hard just yet. There was nothing physically or magically stopping Regulus from leaving right now. If Sirius didn't want him to go rushing off into the streets in the middle of the night, then perhaps he should lay off a bit.

He went into the kitchen to fix himself a quick dinner, half hoping that this would awaken Regulus's hunger and entice him to get off the couch, but for the rest of the evening, Regulus didn't move. With a defeated sigh, Sirius washed his dishes and then filled a glass of ice water. He left it on the table for his brother and then, after locking the doors, crawled into bed himself, dejected.

Sleep came surprisingly swiftly that night, but it did not last long. By two o'clock he was awake again. Out of compulsion, he got up to check on Regulus. He found him spread eagle on the sofa, his arm dangling off the side and his head bent uncomfortably against the armrest.

"You're going to fuck up your neck, Regulus," Sirius whispered. He couldn't help himself. First he reached slowly to undo Regulus's shoes, cautiously in case the latter woke up. Regulus shifted a little but otherwise did not stir. Sirius shook his head softly, then he tugged off Regulus's pants and jacket, leaving him in his shirt and boxers.

"Jesus, you're going to kill me if you wake up right now," he muttered to himself. Regulus turned out to be very light and easy to carry. Had Sirius been this small when he was thirteen? Certainly not. Regulus was just made that way: light. Regulus's head lolled against Sirius's shoulder as he carried him down the hall.

Sirius remembered quite well from his childhood that Regulus preferred the wallside of the bed, liking the secure feeling it provided, and so Sirius let him have it. Perhaps when Regulus awoke he would be less angry if he saw Sirius remembered his phobia about falling off the bed? No, of course not, did Regulus even have that particular fear anymore? …But maybe…

Sirius climbed in next to his brother and pulled him close for an instant. Unconscious and therefore uninhibited, Regulus latched onto his brother like a lifeline and mumbled a vague string of nonsense words into his chest. Sirius forced himself to stay awake for several more hours of the night, just to be sure and enjoy this closeness which he knew he was unlikely to be seeing for a very long time.

* * *

_Next chapter's actually done. I'll post it later sometime. As usual, review if you feel like it, but feel no pressure. _

_And in case I don't post anything else before the holidays, Merry Christmas, Happy Chanukah, Happy Kwanzaa, Feliz Navidad, Happy New Year's…etc. etc. you get the point. _

_-tenkuroi_


	2. All Beginners Make Mistakes

**Story Notes: **There's more! You thought I'd stop after one sucky chapter, but no, I've returned. I actually have most of this done already save for like one chapter exactly in the middle, which creates a bit of a problem, as you can imagine.

**Completely Unimportant:** E-mailed this second chapter off to my friend and then completely forgot about posting it…so that's how intelligent _I've _been lately.

* * *

Regulus was gone when Sirius woke up the next morning and for a moment, Sirius was thrown into a panic. He threw on his clothes and dashed down the hallway and into the living room, frantic that his brother might have up and left during the night. If he'd gone back to Grimmauld…

But Regulus was only in the kitchen, sulking at a mug of cold water.

"R—Regulus," Sirius said, calming down somewhat. "You're up really early…"

Regulus said nothing; he only frowned briefly at Sirius before pouring the water down the sink and making to leave the kitchen.

"Hold up," Sirius grabbed him as he marched past. "Did you want to have some tea or something? I can show you how to heat that water in the microwave."

"I'm not thirsty anymore," Regulus growled, trying to shake his brother off. Sirius let him go.

"Did you want me to make you anything to eat?" he asked Regulus's retreating back.

"Do what you want."

Sirius grimaced and started about making some breakfast foods. He didn't normally cook anything fancy, but Regulus was used to full course meals three times a day at home, so he figured he'd better start. What were Teenage-Regulus's favorite foods?

Fuck, he didn't know anymore. Come to think of it, there were a lot of things Sirius couldn't say about his brother. What music did he like now? Did he still enjoy mystery novels like he had when he was younger? Andromeda used to read them to him…had the two of them spoken since Andromeda was disowned?

Sirius shook his head. Waffles. Regulus had _loved_ those when he was little. Plain waffles with no syrup but a little bit of cinnamon. He'd always eaten them with his hands.

Did Sirius even own any cinnamon?

Fuck.

The doorbell rang.

"Would you get the door for me, Regulus?" Sirius asked. There was no reply.

"Regulus?" he walked into the living room, only to see his brother was nowhere in sight. "Dammit," he muttered, rolling his eyes and opening the door himself.

Lily tumbled in gracelessly.

"Oh, hi, Lily," Sirius said.

"Hey," she responded cheerfully. "How're things?"

"Fine," Sirius answered. "Did you want to come in and sit down…it's seriously early."

"No," Lily insisted. "I'm just here to get you, remember? To take you to the meeting? James thinks we've got a good chance of being allowed to join…"

Shit, Sirius racked his brain. What was Lily—oh right! Dumbledore's secret organization, the Order of the Phoenix. Many students who had already graduated had joined up, and with the proper amount of begging, Dumbledore had been persuaded to give very minor roles to sixth and seventh year wizards. Nothing at all very dangerous, but it was a good 'getting your foot in the door' sort of gesture. Sirius had been looking forward to it. He and James had been talking of nothing but this first meeting for months, but now he wasn't so sure. What would he do with Regulus?

"Uh, well Lily…" Sirius stumbled over his words. Could he leave Regulus home for a few hours without him running off? He couldn't possibly bring him with, he was way too young.

"Remus, James, and Peter are meeting us there."

"Right, but you see, I kind of actually have, like…well it's—"

"And Frank and Alice are members, too, they're putting a good word in for us with Dumbledore and his brother—"

"Uh…" Sirius glanced nervously behind him, halfway hoping that Regulus would stay out of sight. He really didn't want to go announcing his new situation to the world until he and his brother had worked out a few base rules. He turned back to Lily. "You know I really want to go, but this morning I'm kind of busy with…"

"Regulus?" Lily asked suddenly, craning her neck around Sirius's shoulder and staring at his brother, who had evidently meandered back into the entryway to investigate who had come into the apartment.

Sirius turned around. Regulus was fully dressed now, and scowling immensely.

"Right," Sirius said slowly, closing his eyes in anguish. "My brother is staying with me. I've got custody of him now—"

"Like hell you have!" screeched Regulus indignantly.

"—yeah, we're working on some things…" Sirius turned around swiftly and pushed Regulus by the shoulders back into the hallway. "You're killing me here, Regulus," he muttered through clenched teeth.

"What?" exclaimed Regulus loudly, staring around Sirius and back at Lily, who had poked her head around the corner. "Don't want the fucking mudblood to see me?"

"_Regulus!"_ Sirius growled.

Regulus only sneered and swatted his brother's hands off his shoulders. "Don't touch me," he seethed.

Sirius glanced shyly back at Lily, only to see she had tactfully disappeared. With a sigh, he snatched ahold of Regulus by the hair and dragged him into his bedroom.

"In," he tossed him through the doorway.

"What do you think you're doing?"

"I'm going out…somewhere," Sirius said. "You're staying here. And I mean _here._ In this room."

"Sirius!"

"Quiet, Regulus. Just…quiet." Sirius made to close the door, but Regulus grabbed the other handle before he could.

"Are you _locking _me in this room?" he demanded incredulously. For a minute, they played an angry game of tug-of-war with the bedroom door.

"Uh…Yes," Sirius yanked hard and the door snapped shut. He heard Regulus cry out and gently thump to the floor. "Serves you right," he muttered through the door before locking it with his wand.

"Give me my wand, Sirius!" Regulus's voice sounded surprisingly loud considering there were two inches of wall blocking his words.

"No," Sirius said simply. "Now stop yelling, or I'll put up a silence barrier before I leave as well."

Sirius walked calmly back to the entryway, ignoring Regulus's furious pounding on the bedroom door. He grabbed his jacket from the hall closet.

"I'm ready to go, Lily," he said. Lily walked around from the living room, holding up a short wand made of a deep, reddish wood.

"Is this your brother's?" she asked curiously.

"Oh, yeah. He left it on the coffee table last night; he uh, slept in there for a while. I'll take it."

Sirius put the wand in his pocket and Lily opened the door for him.

"Sirius!" Regulus screamed. "You bastard, at least tell me where you're going!"

"Your brother has…well he really has some impressive lungs," Lily said awkwardly.

"Yeah, just…yeah," Sirius kicked the door shut. Immediately there was silence from inside the apartment. He grabbed Lily's hand and the two of them apparated away together to Aberforth Dumbledore's house to meet with the Order.

ﯕⱤﯕⱤﯕⱤ

Regulus seethed for a very long time, and he systematically dismantled Sirius's bedroom in the process. He kicked small dents into the walls, tore down pictures and smashed every item sitting atop his brother's desk. With a sort of detached fury, he tore the pages from Sirius's books and broke his lamp. Sirius's owl, eyed him intently from his perch in the corner while he sent his brother's quills and ink sailing towards the wall. Only when he yanked the curtains down from their rod did he pause.

The window…Regulus stared wistfully out it. Sirius had only locked the door, and they were on the first floor; he could easily climb out.

Did he want to?

No. Actually, he didn't. After all, where would he go, home? He couldn't return to that place so soon and without his wand, he'd look foolish (at least this was the reason he told himself). It was still nice to look outside, though. His bedroom at Grimmauld had overlooked the property's dead garden. This view was much nicer. He could see the trees lining the streets, people walking, stores, dogs, children…

Regulus was startled out of his daydreaming when the curtain rod, loosened from the wall when he'd torn down the drapes, clattered down to the ground, narrowly missing his face.

Regulus observed it in its new position on the floor for a while before slowly turning to take in the rest of the room. It was trashed. Maybe Sirius would kick him out for it, Regulus thought, send him back home. He nodded to himself. Sirius would surely get rid of him the instant he realized this situation was going to take _effort_, and that his little brother was too much to deal with. Regulus was positive that when Sirius got home, he would throw him his bag and send him walking back to Grimmauld.

Only Regulus wouldn't return there. Where he would go, he wasn't sure, maybe to a friend's house. After all, Sirius had run away to go play house with his new brother, James. Why shouldn't Regulus do the same?

Sirius's bird hooted dolefully behind him.

Perhaps this would be a good time to get in touch with some of his classmates. Antonin, Severus, his cousin Rabastan…Regulus hunted through Sirius's desk for some paper and a pen before sitting down to start some letters, the room behind him in ruins.

ﯕⱤﯕⱤﯕⱤ

Sirius hadn't been expecting much, but even so, he was disappointed in the amount of information withheld from him at the meeting. After barely two hours of pointless arguing over possible political actions, Sirius and his friends had been kicked out. It stung a little to know that the rest of the Order were probably talking some serious strategy at this point.

"Well it could have gone worse," said Lily, walking close beside James with her hands deep in her jacket pockets. She had her hood up over her head to block out the light drizzle that had started up.

"…how?" asked James incredulously.

"We could have been treated like twelve year olds, mocked silently, and then thrown out into the rain when it came time to actually discuss Voldemort."

"Lily," said Remus. "That's exactly what happened."

"Oh…well fuck."

"Okay," James admitted. "So we don't get to help plan any sorts of cool espionage missions, we were still _there,_ weren't we? I mean, they let us in on some things. And from here on out, I'm sure it'll only get easier and easier to integrate ourselves in the group."

Sirius bit his lip, and his mind wandered while Lily, James, Peter, and Remus argued over how angry they should be. His thoughts kept coming back to Regulus and the fit he'd thrown earlier when he'd seen Lily. Sirius grimaced when he remembered what he'd called her. Perhaps Regulus was farther gone than he thought.

He really hoped Regulus had calmed down so they could talk.

"—Sirius?"

He was a little anxious, too, wondering how Regulus had handled being shut in his room. Sirius hoped he hadn't broken the door down. Normally Regulus was way too quiet and reserved for that sort of outburst, but with how angry he'd been…

"I said, _Sirius_!"

"Sorry, what?" Sirius stumbled a little.

Remus raised an eyebrow at him. "Lily was asking you a question about your brother," he said.

Sirius flinched. James and Peter didn't know about Regulus yet, and truthfully he hadn't wanted them to. He wasn't sure why, but he felt he would have preferred to keep the whole situation a little more secret.

"Sorry, what Lily?"

"I was just checking to make sure you still had his wand. It would have been disastrous if you had left it at Aberforth's."

"Oh," Sirius felt his pockets. "Yeah, I've still got it."

"Why do you have your brother's wand?" asked James curiously.

The five of them turned a corner.

"My brother's staying with me now…because our parents are psychopaths and I don't want him around them. I took Reg's wand with me tonight because I just didn't want to leave it lying in the house while I was gone."

"But why did you take it from him in the first place?" asked Remus slowly.

"I didn't take it from him, he left it in the living room."

"Where was he?" Remus was confused.

"Locked in the bedroom."

"…Sirius!"

"What?" Sirius said indignantly. Peter and Lily were walking between them, and their heads were whipping back and forth at a dizzying pace as they tried to keep tabs on the argument.

"Why on earth would you lock him in your room?"

"Because I had to leave, and he was being a brat," Sirius turned to Lily for help. "Wasn't he, Lily?"

"Don't drag me into this!"

"Well he was!"

Remus rolled his eyes so hard Sirius was surprised they remained in his head. "Sirius," he moaned. "You can't just shut him away whenever you guys have a problem. You won't make any progress like that; plus it's dangerous. What if something had happened and he'd needed to get out? Or to use his wand for something?"

"Oh I hadn't thought of that," commented Lily in an offhand voice. "I bet you'd feel like a real prick if Regulus died in a housefire or something."

Sirius's pace unconsciously quickened.

"I didn't consider that…" he mumbled.

"I'm sure your brother's fine," James said assuredly. "He's not four year's old, is he? He's like, twelve or something."

"Thirteen," Sirius corrected him automatically.

"Whatever. Listen, don't freak out about this, seriously if you're not careful you're going to turn into one of those obnoxiously overobsessed parents that nobody wants to be friends with. Peter, we turn here…"

James and Lily led Peter off down a street to the right and Sirius continued on with Remus after waving idly at them, still preoccupied by their conversation.

"Sirius," the werewolf began, but Sirius cut him off.

"Remus," he said firmly. "I just want to get home."

ﯕⱤﯕⱤﯕⱤ

Sirius would be lying to insist he wasn't at all relieved when he returned to his apartment and saw it still standing. With a sigh, he let himself inside and ventured down the hallway to his room. He unlocked the door and stepped inside.

"Regulus?" he asked, dumbstruck. The entire room was a wreck; everything was broken. The wallpaper was sliced to ribbons, there were holes in the wall, half of Sirius's possessions were lying in pieces on the floor, the window was cracked, and there, standing in the very center of it all was Regulus Black, arms folded and a completely passive look on his face.

"What…the hell?" Sirius yelled. And to think he had been upset earlier at the thought of Regulus burning to death in his apartment, that was almost a welcome image now! Sirius without thinking raised his wand and pointed it at Regulus, making to hex him for what he'd done. It would be easy, after all, he'd done it before, plenty of times at home when they were younger, or when they'd argued up at the school…

…but he found himself pausing. Sirius made himself lower his arm back to his side. He couldn't retaliate like this, could he? His circumstances had changed. He wasn't just an annoyed older brother anymore, he was a parent. Or a guardian at the very least. He needed to calm down.

"Regulus," he asked. "is there a particular reason you decided to destroy my bedroom?"

Regulus, who had up until that point stared on with a completely blank, emotionless expression, suddenly started. "What?" he seemed confused. "Aren't you—"

"Never mind, maybe it doesn't matter," Sirius admitted. He sat down on the bed and motioned for Regulus to join him. He didn't, and continued to stare at Sirius as though he were some ungodly creature come crawling out of the earth.

Sirius continued talking anyway.

"You can't act like this, Regulus, okay? Saying those awful things to Lily, who is one of the kindest people on this planet—occasional instances aside—wrecking my room like this. I'm not asking a lot here, just give this situation a chance, please, because I might not be all that smart, but even I can see far enough down the future to hazard a guess at where your life's going…and with the way things are looking, this situation's the only chance you've got of not ending up in prison or dead by the time you're twenty. Is that what you want?"

Regulus didn't say anything. He was almost determinedly silent.

"All right," said Sirius, standing up. He threw Regulus his wand. Regulus caught it, surprised. "You want to go wait in the living room for a few minutes, please? I'm going to try and see how much of this I can clean up…"

Regulus stared at him incredulously for a few more seconds, then swiftly walked to the door. "I sent your owl off with a letter to one of my friends," he offered.

"Okay," was all Sirius said. Regulus left the room, closing the door softly behind him.

When Sirius emerged forty minutes later, he approached his brother again. Regulus was sitting cross-legged on the sofa, reading a book he'd brought with him. He looked up with slight interest when he noticed Sirius's presence.

Standing over Regulus with both their jackets in his hand, Sirius heaved a sigh. "Want to go out to dinner?" he asked.

ﯕⱤﯕⱤﯕⱤ

Dinner was a quiet affair. Regulus tried to pay for his food but Sirius wouldn't let him. They argued for a long while before both standing up in exclamation, setting money on the table, and walking out, leaving the confused waiter with a tip roughly equal to half the overall bill. Then they walked back home.

Sirius's tawny owl was waiting for them, perched in the tree by the door. He fluttered down to Regulus's shoulder and dropped a letter into his hands before throwing himself at Sirius. Sirius caught his bird against his chest and said in what he hoped was an offhand voice, "Who're you writing to, Regulus?"

Regulus rolled his eyes as Sirius attempted to unlock the door one-handed.

"Rabastan," he answered simply. It wasn't worth it to him to lie, Sirius would only keep bothering him about it.

"Lestrange?" asked Sirius critically as he let them inside and fumbled blindly for the light switch.

"Yes, Lestrange, our _cousin,_" said Regulus spitefully. He pushed past his brother and walked towards the bathroom. "Not that I'd expect _you_ to remember any of your family."

"Regulus," Sirius groaned. He tried to follow him but the door was closed in his face with a sharp snap. Moments later he heard the shower running. "All right," he conceded. "I won't push it. Just please come to bed when you're done. Don't even think about trying to sleep in the living room again, I'll just drag your ass to the actual bed if you do…"

"Whatever," Regulus muttered. With his back to the bathroom wall, he slid to the floor. The shower was on behind him, but he didn't feel like getting in just yet. Idly, he flipped open the letter from Rabastan.

_Regulus,_ it said.

_Have you seriously allowed yourself to be kidnapped by that insane, blood-traitor of a brother of yours? I wouldn't have expected you to put up with it. I can't see this whole thing lasting more than a day, Sirius has already proven he can't stand the thought of living with real Blacks, hasn't he? He'll bore of this soon. However, if you haven't already gotten yourself thrown back out into the streets, though, don't push for it, seriously. Stick around for a while, you can make the most of this. _

_Let me know if Sirius does anything interesting, and I can tell my brother. He's extraordinarily curious for some reason. Actually the advice I just gave you was mostly his. _

_If nothing else, keep on Sirius's good side long enough to see if he'll let you come over here next week, it's Bellatrix and Rodolphus's anniversary and we're having a party-type thing. Let me know._

_Rabastan._

When Regulus finished Rabastan's letter, he held it under the jet of water falling from the showerhead. The ink ran on the page and soon it was soft enough to send down the drain. Regulus wasn't quite sure why, but he didn't like the idea that Sirius might ever read it, and going through his mail was exactly something the annoying fucker was inclined to do.

Shaking his head, Regulus got undressed and finally hopped under the hot water, thinking about an awful lot of things.


	3. Cunning is Cruel

**Moar chapter!**

So I had the first chapter of this other Sirius/Regulus story all ready to go (intentional backslash) but then I got nervous about how explicit it was an posted this instead. Crisis averted. n.n

Enjoy! -tenkuroi

* * *

Sirius never really spoke with Regulus about their argument that night Lily had arrived. A part of him naively hoped it was a one-time thing, and that they didn't have to address it. The little Remus that nestled within his superego kept telling him otherwise, though, insisting that he was being childish and covering up the problem instead of attempting to fix it. And for an instant, Sirius was almost inclined to give in to that niggling doubt in the back of his mind. He almost caved and sat his brother down for what would have surely been an awkward and intimidating conversation, but then something happened that relieved him of the necessity…

Regulus started behaving himself. Immediately. When he got out of the shower that night he came straight into Sirius's bedroom without fussing, changed into his pajamas and actually folded his clothes before placing them into the hamper. Sirius stared at him suspiciously.

Regulus turned to his brother and after a brief pause, asked quietly, "Can I have the wallside, Sirius?"

Sirius blinked. "Sure…" he said, getting up so Regulus could take his place.

"Thanks."

Nonplussed, Sirius slid back into bed next to his brother. He made to lie as close to the edge as possible to leave as much space as he could between them because he thought Regulus would prefer that, but Regulus didn't seem very concerned about that. He rolled right up next to Sirius and immediately closed his eyes. He was asleep within minutes.

"Goodnight…" said Sirius slowly. Shaking his head, he flipped off the lights and settled down to sleep, thinking maybe Regulus was just incredibly tired.

The next day had been even stranger. Sirius found himself woken up gently by Regulus standing over him and nudging his shoulder.

"What—?" Sirius blinked up at him. "What time is it, Regulus?"

"A little after seven. Sirius, I wanted to make some breakfast, do you mind if I use your kitchen?"

"Huh?" Sirius was not quite awake yet. "I don't care, Regulus," he muttered groggily. He rolled back over and threw the blankets over his head. "Do whatever you want."

Regulus disappeared and Sirius fell back asleep for a few moments, only to be awoken again by the smell of bacon and coffee. Having completely forgotten his earlier conversation with Regulus, he staggered out of bed in confusion and made his way to the kitchen.

Regulus was just sliding food onto plates when Sirius arrived.

"Regulus…what on earth are you doing?"

Regulus filled a mug with black coffee and handed it to Sirius. "Making food," he said incredibly slowly, as though speaking to someone who was not all there in the head. "You said I could."

"I did?" Sirius tried to remember but couldn't. Eventually he shrugged and took a drink from the cup Regulus had handed him.

"Have I done something wrong?" asked Regulus.

"No, I'm just surprised," admitted Sirius. "This looks really good," he indicated the plates of food. "Since when can you cook?"

Regulus refused to explain himself. Instead he poured himself some milk and they both sat down to eat.

The rest of the day had gone by in a similarly bewildering manner. Regulus had been quiet and polite, and seemed more than eager to please. After a few hours of unease, Sirius finally started to roll with it. Whatever had sparked the change in his brother, he was all for it. Perhaps it was Regulus's way of apologizing for his previous behavior. Sirius made a mental note to bring it up later with Remus.

Around lunchtime Sirius headed to the Potters' house to eat. He felt a little guilty about leaving Regulus behind, but at the same time seriously didn't want to risk him relapsing in front of James's parents. Regulus waved him off idly, though, and when Sirius returned several hours later, it was to a sparkling apartment. He dropped his jacket on the floor and could barely keep his jaw from following it.

Had Regulus really cleaned?

"Regulus?" asked Sirius slowly. "Where are you?" he asked.

Regulus came trotting out from the bedroom. "Sirius? You're back quick…"

"Have you been cleaning?"

Regulus cocked his head to the side. "Yes?" he said. "There was…well I didn't have anything else to do and you were gone." He shrugged and looked up at Sirius worriedly, thinking maybe he'd gone too far.

"No," insisted Sirius. "I'm not angry, just…surprised. This place looks great, actually," he added, glancing around the living room before bending down to pick up his discarded jacket.

Sirius was starting to feel like maybe he should take Regulus to get his head checked.

"Did you eat anything?" Sirius asked. "For lunch, I mean."

Regulus nodded.

"Okay, yeah, that's good…I mean…yes."

Regulus smirked a little. "I'll be in the bedroom if you need me. I was reading," he said idly before turning and leaving Sirius alone again.

Sirius had been so weirded out that he had avoided Regulus for the rest of the day. Not a feat easily accomplished in such a small home, and it mostly amounted to him avoiding his room at all costs. Just when he was starting to seriously ponder just what exactly he should be doing for supper, Regulus joined him in the living room and not long after, all the reasoning behind his behavior came into sharp focus.

To his credit, Regulus waited until they were seated at the table and Sirius was in the middle of swallowing a forkful of microwaveable dinner to fully give himself away.

"Sirius, did you have anything planned for next week?"

Sirius swallowed thickly. "Next week?" he asked loudly. "Like when next week?"

"Sunday night next week."

"Sunday night as in tomorrow?" demanded Sirius. Regulus nodded.

"Would you mind terribly if I were away for a few hours tomorrow night, Sirius?" he asked very politely.

So this was why Regulus had been so complacent of late; he wanted something. Sirius almost groaned. He should have seen this coming, but where on earth would Regulus want to go all of the sudden? Then it clicked in his mind what the only possible option was.

"You want to go visit Rabastan," he said warily.

"Not exactly," said Regulus, looking shocked that Sirius had remembered their cousin so readily. "It's Rodolphus's two year anniversary next weekend and they're having the celebration tomorrow." Regulus felt it might be pertinent to not say Bellatrix's name. Sirius had never been fond of her. If he was reminded of her at all, he might not let Regulus go just on principle; if any member of the Black family might be considered a bad influence, it was their deranged cousin.

"That's kind of short notice," said Sirius in an attempt to delay any sort of decision.

"We were all given a formal invitation four months ago," said Regulus carefully. He seemed to be desperately trying to reel in any disdain threatening to slip into his voice. "I had just forgotten in light of…everything."

"Oh…" Sirius looked down at his plate and did some quick thinking. He really didn't want Regulus at the Lestranges' for an entire evening without him, but he'd never be permitted to go with. Sirius marveled. Not too long ago he hadn't cared what Regulus did at all, and now the thought of him leaving for a single night to be among morally questionable and highly influential people was setting Sirius on edge.

"So may I go? It won't be a problem to get there, I can take the Knight Bus."

_No_! Sirius wanted to scream, but then he thought again of how calm Regulus had been acting. Even if it was all a ruse, Sirius was worried that saying Regulus couldn't go would lead to more arguing, and he had only just gotten most of his belongings duct taped back together.

"I…of course you can go, Regulus, I know how important these sorts of things are to you." And this was exactly the sort of thing that was important to Regulus. Weddings, anniversaries, family events in general, really, he had always put a lot of store in them.

Regulus smiled widely. "Great!" he said. "I'll be leaving at four."

And so Sirius had seen him off the next afternoon, heart filled with dread. It's just a dinner party, he kept telling himself, but to no avail. Regulus had actually left a few minutes earlier than planned because he wanted to stop somewhere to purchase a gift for Rodolphus and Bellatrix. Just before he'd walked out the door, Sirius had reached out and touched his shoulder briefly. A part of him really wanted to hug his brother goodbye, but he chickened out and only nodded, murmuring, "Remember to come home by midnight, please. I don't mean _leave_ by midnight, I mean be _here_ by then, or I'll come looking for you."

Regulus smiled quickly, then turned away, at least waiting until his back was to Sirius before rolling his eyes.

ﯕⱤﯕⱤﯕⱤ

"And that's basically it," said Sirius, shrugging.

"That's why you've been so jumpy this evening?" asked Remus. Sirius nodded.

"It just makes me nervous, is all, him being there alone. I mean, what if my parents are there?"

"Sirius," said Remus, reaching to take a reference text off the bookstore shelf and beginning to thumb through it. "If you're that uncomfortable with the idea, why did you allow him to leave in the first place?"

Sirius walked slowly to the side, reading title after title and tapping various book spines. He normally wouldn't be caught dead in such a boring and dusty old bookshop but Regulus seemed to like to read (he sure had been doing a lot of it lately) and Sirius needed a birthday gift for the kid. He had decided to use the few hours Regulus would be gone to get some shopping done. He only had until Thursday, after all.

"We'd been getting along so well, sort of," answered Sirius lamely. "I just mean that he'd been acting so much calmer and less hostile. I guess I was nervous that if I said no, he'd go right back to fighting me at every turn. I thought if I said yes that it might give him a reason to continue being so nice to me…Moony do _not_ look at me like that!"

Remus was shaking his head and giving Sirius a very pitying look.

"Oh," Sirius groaned and clunked his forehead against the alphabetized cookbooks. "What have I done _now?_" He was almost afraid of the answer.

"Sirius," Remus pulled him back into an upright position. "You really can't go about things that way. You won't get anywhere by letting him manipulate you."

"I was not manipulated!"

Remus scoffed. "Yes, you were…but I'm telling you, Padfoot, your goal is to keep him out of trouble right?"

"If by trouble you mean the disgusting and controlling grip of my egotistical and sometimes violent family then yes."

"Okay, but my point is you're never going to be able to spark any kind of change in your brother if he can just walk all over you. You can't be scared of him, Sirius."

"I am not scared of him!" screeched Sirius indignantly.

"All right, all right," Remus cajoled. "I'll rephrase myself: you can't be scared of confrontations with him, Sirius, because they're your only sign of progress. If you're arguing, then at least you're acknowledging one another. If he fights with you, then at least it means he's listening."

"So the screaming matches are a good thing?" asked Sirius incredulously.

Remus rolled his eyes. "At this early stage in the game, _yes._ Much better than the alternative."

"Which is?"

"Silence. When Regulus shuts you out completely, Sirius, it's because he's trying to make you feel how he did when you left home: like you don't exist, like you don't matter at all to him. Trust me, if he screams and argues with you, it at least means that he feels you're worth talking to."

"Do you think I have a chance, Remus?" asked Sirius after a moment of letting his friend's words sink in. "I can make Regulus stay with me, at least for a while, but I can't really force him to listen to me, especially after we go back to school this fall."

"I have no idea, Sirius. That all really boils down to how you and Regulus end up working everything out, and of course how well you adhere to all of my wonderful advice."

"That's it, we're leaving."

Remus laughed. "Where are we going, might I ask?"

"To a different store to shop, I'm tired of looking at books."

A crooked smile slipped onto Remus's face. "All right then, but here," he yanked a small, leather-bound book off the bottom shelf. "Buy this before we go and give it to your brother for his birthday."

"What is it?"

"I listened carefully to that needlessly long description of him from when he was younger, you know, the speech you talked my ear off with for like half an hour before I agreed to help you go birthday shopping? It's a novel. Trust me, he'll like it…and I ought to know; I feel like he's _my_ little brother by this point."

"Well okay, but I'm still buying him something else, too, in case this book sucks."

ﯕⱤﯕⱤﯕⱤ

"Isn't he great?" asked Rabastan, snapping Regulus out of a minor daydream. The two of them were sitting on Rabastan's bed, sifting through newspapers and periodicals. When the drinking and dancing had died down and the more boring events of the evening commenced, they had retreated up to Rabastan's bedroom to wait it out.

"Yes," said Regulus, cutting out an article and holding it up into the light. Near the top was a poorly taken photograph the description claimed was the Dark Lord himself. "You have quite the affectation for him, Rabastan, collecting all these papers."

"I like to catalogue things," said Rabastan. "And everyone is sure that this is going to be the most remembered political movement of the century. I just want to keep good records."

Regulus watched carefully as Rabastan took the article from him and slid it into his notebook alongside the others.

"Records," Regulus scoffed. "You want to be a part of it all, I can tell."

Rabastan looked up at him. "Who wouldn't?" he said with deadly seriousness. "Who wouldn't die for the opportunity?"

"My brother," laughed Regulus. Rabastan cocked his head and Regulus quieted immediately, unsure of why he had suddenly brought up Sirius.

"Speaking of him…" Rabastan stood up. "Have you spoken with Rodolphus at all this evening? He was wanting to talk to you."

"No," said Regulus, suddenly a little uneasy. "I haven't had the chance. I'm sure I'll speak with him later…"

"No, let's go back downstairs now, I'm sure they've started dancing again by now, come on."

"D—don't you want to finish cutting these out and whatnot?" asked Regulus desperately. He had been having an incredibly decent time with his cousin, why had he gone and wrecked it by mentioning that Gryffindor traitor? Even when he was thirty miles away, Sirius still managed to ruin everything for him!

"No, I can do this whenever. Rod's been dying to talk to you in person, and who knows when he'll get another chance."

"I'm sure he can talk with my anytime," insisted Regulus. "I'm not that hard to find."

"Rodolphus isn't around much anymore, in fact he's leaving again day after tomorrow for God only knows how long. I'm sure he'd be angry to miss a chance to see you tonight."

"Where is he going?" asked Regulus curiously.

Rabastan leaned close. "Wherever the Dark Lord sends him," he whispered mysteriously.

Regulus's eyes widened. "Do you mean…?"

"Yes!" Rabastan exclaimed. Then his voice dropped back down again. "He and Bellatrix joined last winter. I'm not supposed to know, but I overheard Father talking and eventually worked it all out. Rodolphus is a fully fledged Death Eater."

"Wow," gasped Regulus. "He really works with the Dark Lord, then? And you must be…well this means you'll have a much easier time getting in yourself!"

Rabastan laughed. "What makes you think that I want to be a Death Eater as well?"

Regulus gave him a look. "It's obvious from a hundred miles away," he scoffed. "Anyone with eyes can see you're itching to join!"

"Have I been that bad about hiding it?" asked Rabastan, eyes glinting. "I guess I'll have to tone it down a bit. What do you think, Regulus?"

"About what?"

"The Dark Lord, idiot. When do you think you'll start looking into joining up with him as well? Rodolphus says that with as dangerous as it is, he wants me to wait until after I graduate, but I hear He'll have you as soon as you're old enough to apparate."

Truthfully, Regulus hadn't been putting a lot of thought into his future lately. He had mostly been trying to organize his present day, which unnervingly involved a lot of Sirius.

"I wouldn't want to join up before I was ready and able to impress him," Regulus hedged.

"True," admitted Rabastan. "But just the same, I want to get involved early. I don't want anyone saying that I jumped on the bandwagon after the Dark Lord started winning!"

Regulus nodded.

"And you'd be surprised just what uses He could find for someone like us, you don't even really have to be an official Death Eater."

"What do you mean, the Dark Lord hires interns?" Regulus said sarcastically.

"Har har," Rabastan dragged him off the bed and out the door. "Just come on, let's find Rodolphus and I'll let him talk to you."

"Right," Regulus gave up and let himself be dragged off. That had always kind of been how his friendship with Rabastan worked, now that he thought about it. Rabastan would lead and he would follow without arguing. Regulus had never been one for confrontation, only Sirius had ever been able to bring out that side of him.

Down in the main ballroom, everyone was socializing and dancing again as the party gained its second wind. Before they could locate the man of the hour, however, Regulus and Rabastan ran straight into Narcissa at the buffet table, who paused her conversation with Regulus's father to look down at him.

"Regulus," she smiled. "We were _just_ talking about you, weren't we, Uncle?"

Regulus froze, eyes as wide as dinner plates. When his shocked silence reached the ten second mark, Rabastan kicked him.

"I—uh, yes," Regulus fumbled for something to say. "I hope you had pleasant things to say."

"Indeed," said Orion Black slowly in that perfect drawl of his that Regulus, although he tried valiantly, could never perfectly imitate. "We were just discussing your most recent…vacation choice."

Regulus could only just control his trembling. Originally his parents had sent word that they would be unavailable for this party, and up until right then Regulus had seen neither hide nor hair of either of them, and had so assumed they were not showing up. Yet here his father was, standing tall and menacing with his black formal robes and powerfully cold stare.

"Yes," Narcissa commented, seeming totally unaware of the copious amounts of ice clinging to the conversation. "Your father was mentioning how you've run off to your brother's for the summer?"

Regulus forced a smile. "I thought Mother and Father could use a break from me to enjoy the summer themselves," he insisted.

"Yes, it was quite the surprise to come home and find you gone," Mr. Black's voice was almost tangibly frostbitten. "And while a break is nice, I'm sure your mother and I will start missing you very soon. What a _wonderful_ welcome home we'll have to have when you come back to us."

Regulus nodded dumbly, suddenly wishing to be locked in conversation with Rodolphus Lestrange. Anything but this.

"Oh! There he is," Rabastan pulled Regulus to his side again. "I do not wish to be rude, sir and Cissy, but Regulus and I came down here looking for my brother and I think I see him just over there. If you'll excuse us…"

Regulus felt himself being pulled away again to a far corner of the dance floor.

"Where's Rodolphus?" he asked when they stopped walking.

Rabastan shrugged. "Somewhere around here I suspect, but I don't know where exactly. I just felt you needed to get out of there."

Regulus gave Rabastan a genuine smile. "Thanks," he muttered weakly.

"No problem, I—oh, hi Rodolphus, you actually are over here."

Regulus turned around to see the oldest Lestrange approaching them.

"Hi Rabastan," he said dismissively. "Regulus," he addressed the youngest Black. "I'm delighted that you're here tonight, Rabastan has told me that you're living with your brother now, and I've been meaning to talk to you."

"Oh?" asked Regulus keenly.

"Here, let us move where there is not so much noise," Rodolphus led Regulus out into the hallway and then down to the kitchen, shooing Rabastan away as they walked.

Alone in the kitchen with Rodolphus, Regulus sat at the table, mindlessly accepting the wineglass handed to him.

"What did you want to talk about, sir?" he asked.

"Oh nothing important, really," said Rodolphus, pouring them both some wine. He took a long sip of his own. "Just that I'm sure Rabastan has told you about me by now."

"Told me about what?" Regulus feigned innocence. He didn't want to get Rabastan in trouble after all.

"You don't have to act like that now," Rodolphus laughed. "I know Rabastan figured out about Bella and me joining His ranks. He's not _supposed_ to know, technically, but I'm not about to obliviate him for figuring it out."

Regulus nodded and fidgeted with his glass. "Yes, he told me," he admitted.

"Good, I assumed he would have," Rodolphus said, nodding. He had sat himself down opposite of Regulus, and the latter couldn't help but feel like he was being interrogated.

"Now I don't want you to get too excited, but I have a proposition for you."

Regulus perked up. "What kind of a proposition?" he asked.

Rodolphus smiled and sat back in his chair. "I'm sure you can reason that the Dark Lord does not go about recruiting children…"

Regulus bristled a little at being called a child. "I'm aware," he said, glaring slightly.

"But they can be useful to him."

"How so?" Regulus could feel the blood pounding in his head.

Rodolphus sat straight again before leaning forward. His hands were under the table, and Regulus couldn't shake the uncomfortable feeling that he had a hold of his wand.

"You see, Regulus, you're in a perfect position right now with your brother. Sirius is…how should I say this? A lost cause. He's sided completely with that mudblood-loving fool, Albus Dumbledore, and you can bet he's getting in on his agenda."

Regulus swallowed. "Has Dumbledore been causing problems for Him? Surely he wouldn't dare to get in the way of someone so powerful?"

"Unfortunately he _is_ that foolish," Rodolphus said darkly. "Now I imagine you know all too well how much Sirius deserves to be taken down a peg?"

"I thought we were talking about Dumbledore?"

Rodolphus pretended not to hear him. "He's a deserter after all, a coward who abandoned his family. I'm sure you would love an opportunity to let him know just how someone as loyal as yourself feels about that."

Regulus found himself nodding. He did so very badly want Sirius to understand just how inconsiderate he had been. He wanted Sirius to finally be regretful for so callously destroying what little family Regulus had to begin with, for trampling it into nothing, for being so _selfish._

"I hate him," he whispered.

Rodolphus smiled condolingly. He stood up and walked around behind his cousin, placing a hand on either shoulder. "So here's what I'm proposing," he said, leaning down very close to Regulus's face. "All you have to do is let me know all about Sirius's meetings with Dumbledore. What kinds of things get said, who all was there, et cetera. Sirius does sneak off to meet with Dumbledore and his cronies, doesn't he?"

Regulus fidgeted a little in Rodolphus's grip. "He was gone for a long time the other night with that mudblood Lily Evans, and she said they were going to some kind of a meeting."

"That's perfect, Regulus," Rodolphus cooed. He ran a hand briefly through Regulus's hair before backing away. "Why don't you just remember to keep in touch with me, okay? And I'll be sure the Dark Lord knows what an excellent help the Black heir has been to his cause."

"Yeah," said Regulus. "Okay, I mean…if you really think I could be helpful."

"You'll be His favorite before you've even joined, Regulus, I promise. Now…why don't you get home already? It's well past eleven, and we don't want brother dearest getting worried, do we?"

Regulus shook his head resolutely, downed the last of his alcohol, and let Rodolphus escort him outside so the Knight Bus could come and pick him up.

ﯕⱤﯕⱤﯕⱤ

"Regulus!" Sirius, who had been dozing in his armchair, sat bolt upright when he heard the front door opening. When his brother walked in, he felt an immense wave of relief. Regulus had come back, and on time at that. Standing up, Sirius rushed to meet him.

"I…did you have a nice time?" he asked breathlessly.

Regulus nodded.

"What did you end up buying Rodolphus and Bellatrix?"

Regulus only shrugged, not wanting to open his mouth.

"Hey," Sirius poked and prodded at him. "What's wrong, are you okay?"

Regulus swatted at his hands. "M'fine, leave me alone," he finally muttered.

As soon as the words left his brother's mouth, Sirius realized why he'd been so adamant about silence. "I see the party had alcohol," Sirius commented airily.

Regulus refused to answer and tried to walk away but Sirius had a firm grip on him.

"It's okay," Sirius said, trying to get Regulus to look at him. "I'm not really allowed to be mad or anything because I didn't really tell you you couldn't drink before you left. Would you be willing to humor me and not do it in the future, though? It makes me nervous."

Regulus wanted to yell, wanted to tell Sirius exactly where he could shove all his rules and requests. He stopped himself, though. If he wanted Sirius to feel like talking to him uninhibited…

"Okay," said Regulus brightly. "I promise I won't drink anymore if you don't like it."

Sirius beamed. He hadn't expected Regulus to comply. "Great," he said. "And I'm glad you had fun at our cousins'…"

Regulus spun out of Sirius's grasp and leaned in to give him a brief, one-armed hug. "I'm going to go and sleep now, okay? I'll see you tomorrow."

"Wait!" Sirius called as Regulus walked down the hall. He stopped him just before he got to the bedroom. "Don't go in yet."

Regulus quirked an eyebrow but stayed where he was. Sirius dashed in before him and grabbed the bag he had left on the bed earlier which contained Regulus's birthday gifts. Quickly he hid them in his chest in the closet. "All right, you can come in now," he called.

Regulus walked into the room. "What was that about?" he questioned curiously, changing with relief out of his fancy party robes and into some sleepwear.

"Nothing," said Sirius. "Nothing at all."

Regulus rolled his eyes thinking _just put up with it for now…_

"Good night, Sirius," he said, sliding into bed. "I love you."

Sirius blinked. "I…I love you too."


	4. Too Young for Such Hatred

**Moar chaptah. And there is no structure to any of this is there? It's what I get for refusing to outline this story and just jumping in headfirst. That'll teach me.**

* * *

Sirius had to admit that he was actually a little sad to be in a furniture store of all places. Was it weird to admit that he liked having his brother sleep next to him? Probably. Regardless, that's where he and Regulus were now, shopping for a second bed that was to be, as Regulus believed it, the youngest Black's birthday present.

"How about this one?" Lily asked, flopping herself down on a twin-sized daybed made of a deep red wood.

Sirius raised an eyebrow. "You're just picking random ones," he accused.

Lily threw an arm over her face. "Yes, oh my god, please just pick one so we can get out of here. It's been like an hour."

"You offered to help," Sirius pointed out. He walked up behind Regulus, who had been spending an unnerving amount of time in the expensive import section of the store, and gently led him towards the four posters.

"I offered to help you two weaklings carry the bed into your apartment. I didn't think I'd been commissioned to help with this part. What's taking you guys so bloody long?"

"This is an intense decision," Sirius insisted. A moment later, he noticed Regulus's eyes begin to wander back towards something that looked unsettlingly like a state bed. "Regulus!" he called. "Come here and look at the bed Lily found."

Regulus reluctantly shuffled back to them. Sirius had initially been more than a little nervous to accept Lily's offer of assistance, afraid Regulus might be less than polite to her again, but so far he had remained amicable. True he hadn't said a single word to her, but Sirius supposed complete silence was better than a constant stream of derogatory remarks. Lily seemed to take Regulus's behavior as a compliment.

"A daybed?" Regulus asked his brother.

"A very _nice_ daybed, and look it even comes with a nightstand."

Regulus shrugged. "I guess I think it looks nice," he said.

"Good!" Lily shot up and started frantically waving down one of the store clerks. "Now you guys go get some matching sheets and pillows and then let's get the hell out of here."

Sirius rolled his eyes. "Drama queen," he scoffed. "Come on, Regulus, let's do like she said."

"All right. Thank you again, Sirius. You know you really didn't have to do this."

"I want to," Sirius insisted, walking with an arm slung over Regulus's shoulders. "Can't stand to have you hogging half of _my_ bed forever," he laughed.

_No, I'll bet you can't,_ thought Regulus bitterly. He forced a smile on his face.

It was a muggle store, so Lily paid with her strange bank card and Sirius reimbursed her with gold as soon as nobody was looking. They hauled Regulus's furniture into the back of the truck Lily had borrowed from her mother and drove back home.

"Lily," said Sirius conversationally as he fiddled with the buttons on the passenger side door. "What do I have besides your word that you didn't overcharge me when you translated the pounds to galleons?"

"Absolutely nothing."

"What?"

Lily turned the radio up louder.

"Have you heard anything from your friends lately?" asked Regulus in what he hoped was an inconspicuous tone.

"Why do you ask?" asked Sirius curiously, swiveling around in his seat to face his brother. Lily switched off the music so she could hear them.

"Just wondering," Regulus shrugged. "I sort of got the impression the five of you were always going out together."

"More like the four of them," said Lily with a laugh. "I'm just the extra tag-a-long who leeches on their fun man time every now and then."

There was a pause during which Sirius stared wistfully out the window and Regulus fidgeted with his wand.

"You were supposed to tell me that's not the case, Sirius," said Lily in a low voice.

"Huh? But it was true."

Lily made an exasperated noise and jerked the vehicle hard to the left, sending Sirius careening into the dashboard. Regulus was only just able to steady himself against the back of Lily's seat.

"Ow, holy shit," he cried. "Most people slow down a little before turning!"

"Oh, like you would know," Lily rolled her eyes. "You've never driven a car in your life, and you'd've been fine if you'd been wearing your damn seat belt like I told you to. I swear if you get me a ticket…"

"I do so know how to drive!" insisted Sirius. "I have my motorcycle, you know, and I can turn it just fine!"

"Yeah, in the _air_, Sirius," Lily scoffed. "That's a little different."

"You are insufferable!" Sirius exclaimed.

Lily shrugged and whipped the car sharply to the right, speeding off down the street so fast the tires screeched. Sirius cracked his head on the window.

"Ouch, Jesus. Regulus!" he said while digging through his pockets for his wand. "Put that safety belt thing on, okay?"

"You have a motorcycle that _flies_?" demanded Regulus. He had no idea where his brother could have gotten such a thing. It was certainly something his parents would not have allowed. Another thought began to crawl into his head. "Sirius, that must have been incredibly expensive! Is that what you spent all of Uncle Alphard's money on and that's why you have such a horrible, one bedroom apartment? You bought a flying bicycle and so now I have to share a room with you?"

"Regulus, seat belt!" Sirius yelled again trying to slow Lily's driving down with magic. "And it's a motorcycle, not a bicycle!" he added indignantly. Lily leaned over the centerpiece and wrapped a free hand around Sirius's wrist, stopping his wand waving.

"Hey, let go of me!"

Lily laughed but ultimately released her hold and slowed down. Sirius began pouting and rubbing his wrist like he had been horrifically injured. Regulus glowered at the both of them.

"If my new bed is scratched or broken from all this messing around, the two of you are fixing it," he muttered.

"That's right, Sirius," Lily said. "Careful before you end up having to do home repairs."

"Me?" Sirius screeched. "You're the lunatic who's strifing the car all over the place!"

"It's a truck," Lily insisted.

"What the fuck ever, you're insane!"

Lily put on a look of mock outrage. Seeing where this was going, Regulus yanked his seat belt down from over his shoulder and quickly clicked it into place just as Lily sent them death spiraling down another side street again.

"Motherfucker," Sirius growled, unfolding himself from around the gear shift. Lily laughed.

Regulus wondered briefly if the Dark Lord would consider a shattered spinal column as the result of a horrific and fiery car crash to be an adequate excuse for a lack of timely information.

"Lily, will your mother be able to fix these tires?" asked Regulus when they had pulled up at the apartment. He was crouched in the street, examining with feigned interest the scorched and smoothed tires of Lily's vehicle.

Lily laughed loudly as she hopped down from the driver's seat. "Probably not. We're gonna' need to buy new ones."

"God your parents must love you," muttered Sirius sarcastically. "Now help me lug this thing inside."

"Alright. Regulus, you should get the door," Lily suggested. Regulus bristled first at being ordered by anyone to do anything, and then once again when he reminded himself the person commanding him around was a redheaded mudblood.

Sirius glanced over at his brother, who was starting to glare. A sickening feeling settled in his stomach. With the day's activities and how kind (well okay, un-hostile) Regulus had been acting, he had almost forgotten that his brother had for thirteen years been the kind of person who would happily hex Lily for daring to be in the same zip code as him.

Regulus's scowl disappeared quickly and he gave a lopsided grin quite similar to Sirius's own trademarked one. "Right," he said neutrally and held his hand out to Sirius. "Keys?" he asked.

Sirius handed them over and Regulus unlocked the door and stood by it, waiting to hold it open for Lily and Sirius.

Sirius had charmed the bed lighter, but still needed Lily's help because it was an awkward thing to carry by oneself. Together they guided it into Sirius's bedroom and set it up beneath the window.

"What do you think?" asked Sirius.

Regulus smiled thanked them both.

"Well if you don't mind," Lily said. "I think I should get home now. My parents are expecting me for dinner in an hour and—" but she was cut off by a sharp tapping at the door.

The three of them wandered curiously into the entrance hall and Sirius opened the front door.

"Oh, Lily," he said in surprise. "It's your owl."

Regulus peered around his brother's side. Sure enough, shuffling around on the cement outside the house with a letter in its beak was a small, tawny colored bird with sharp, yellow eyes.

"Interesting," Lily picked the bird up and set it casually on Regulus's shoulder. Regulus closed his eyes in exasperation at this brazen display of camaraderie. First actual mudbloods and now he had to contend with mudblood birds.

"It's from James," Lily said, scanning the note. "Oh! Sirius, they want to have a meeting tonight!"

"Again?" Sirius questioned, momentarily forgetting that Regulus was at his side. "Didn't we just have one?"

"I don't know, something important must have happened. And it looks like we've been specially requested this time by Dumbledore! We might finally get to do something!"

"Do we need to leave now?"

"Yes! James wants us to pick him up…looks like Remus and Peter are already at Aberforth's. We should leave now so I can drop the truck off at my parents' and then apparate to James's…"

"We're going to miss dinner…" grumbled Sirius. Lily looked at him exasperatedly.

"I'll save you something," said Regulus quietly.

"What?" Sirius turned to his brother, seeming to just then remember that he was still in the room.

Regulus picked Lily's owl carefully up off his shoulder and held it out to her. Gently, she took it.

"I'll make some dinner for myself while you're gone and save some for you," Regulus repeated. "I can cook, remember?"

"You can cook?" Lily raised a disbelieving eyebrow. "Didn't you have slaves for that?"

Her tone was more curious than accusatory, but Regulus still gritted his teeth. He muttered something under his breath.

Almost afraid to know, Sirius asked, "want to repeat that a little louder, Reg?"

"He is _not_ a slave."

"Who, Kreacher?" asked Sirius. "Yes he is, Regulus. That's what someone who cooks and cleans and follows your every order for free _is._"

Regulus straightened his back and looked Sirius right in the eyes. "_I_ do the cooking," he admitted in the proudest voice he could manage.

Sirius smirked in disbelief. "No you didn't," he said. "Your meals were brought to you by that unsightly little creature, don't lie."

"I _don't_ lie," said Regulus in a very quiet, flat voice. "He has enough work to do without cooking for Mother and Father as well. He deserves all the help he can get."

Lily cut back in to conversation. "Is that why you're so skinny?" she tried to laugh. "You spend all your time cooking for you parents and pretending the house elf did it so you don't have time to eat yourself?"

Regulus bowed his head to face the ground and tried to walk away, now embarrassed that he had let so much slip. Sirius grabbed his arm, though, and pulled him back.

"I'm sorry," he said, concern in his eyes. "I believe you. I didn't mean to upset you."

"Whatever," Regulus rolled his eyes. "I'll have some food left out for you if you think you can manage to heat it up on your own. I'll probably be in bed."

"You don't have to—"

"I said it's fine," Regulus cut him off. He handed Sirius his jacket from the nearby closet. "Here, it's not summer weather yet. Nighttime still gets cold."

Sirius slipped the coat over his arm. Regulus was in a weird mood and he really didn't want to leave him alone again. "Okay, well…"

"Come meet me in the truck in a second, Sirius," Lily said, walking past them. Regulus caught a glimpse of her owl fluttering off her shoulder and into the dimming sky. He and Sirius stood alone.

"Just go…have fun with your friends," Regulus murmured.

He had chosen the right words to say. Immediately Sirius reached out to Regulus and placed a hand on his shoulder. He absolutely did not want Regulus to think he was blowing him off to go drinking with Lily and James…_James_ who was already such a sore spot for Regulus already.

"I'm not really doing anything fun, Regulus…I don't really want to even go. It's just…just a meeting that I need to go to."

"Meeting for what?" asked Regulus, looked up at his brother shyly.

Sirius bit his lip. Should he say anything? He sighed. He could almost hear Remus talking in the back of his mind, asking him how _exactly_ did he expect Regulus to trust him when he so obviously didn't trust him in return?

"I'm going to an Order meeting," he said quietly. After a brief pause he continued, thinking he might as well go all out. "It's a group of people working together to try and undermine Voldemort's plans. Dumbledore's the head of it so we've got a pretty good chance. My friends and I aren't full members because we're still in school, but this way we'll be ready to help when we do graduate."

"Oh, so you don't get to do a lot?" asked Regulus consolingly.

"Ha," Sirius barked a laugh. "Yeah we get the shaft a lot, last time they kicked us out before the real strategizing began. Mostly we just sat in on Kingsley's speech on how the aurors are closing in on Malfoy, and we got introduced to new members."

Regulus's mind was working furiously. He had to keep Sirius talking.

"Cissy's Malfoy?" he asked in pretend shock.

Sirius shook his head quickly. "No, his father, though I can't expect Lucius is far behind. Their whole family's dark…" _which is why I don't want you near them_ "but they've been messing up lately. Letting things slip in public, and daring to make public trades in Knockturn Alley. The ministry has finally gotten approval to officially monitor most of the shops down there now, watching customer records and such…they're planning some more raids even for some of the stores that haven't been too cooperative."

Regulus nodded, doing his best to look scared. He managed to wheedle a little more information out of his brother before he let up, not wanting to seem overly concerned or suspicious.

"I'd better go," Sirius grimaced when he heard Lily's sounding the horn on her truck. "Can't be late."

Regulus nodded again.

"Please be in bed by the time I get back. I'll see you tomorrow, okay?"

"Okay."

Sirius seemed to be battling with himself. Eventually he gave in and pulled Regulus into a quick hug and placed a light kiss on his cheek. Regulus froze, and remained rigid even after Sirius released him.

When the front door closed with a snap, Regulus wiped his face off so hard with his shirt it burned, and then threw himself at the wall in frustration. He slowly slid down it to the wood floor where he sat, panting for a few moments.

Acting just wasn't for him.

ﯕⱤﯕⱤﯕⱤ

"Here, Regulus, light yourself up," Rabastan waved a fading package of cigarettes under Regulus's nose.

"Jesus," Regulus muttered. He slid the second to last cigarette out of the box and then shoved Rabastan's hand away. "You don't have to stab me with them."

"Just offering," Rabastan smirked, igniting his own smoke with his wand. He breathed in deeply. "Given how shitty an apartment this is, I didn't expect it to have a back patio."

"Yeah, well…surprises surprises," Regulus deadpanned. He sent a column of smoke curling up into the sky, wrapping around stars before disappearing over the moon.

"Can't believe you're staying here instead of Grimmauld, the Dark Lord'd better appreciate the sacrifice you're making for him."

Regulus snorted. The air around him was cold, summer having decided to take back its previously announced arrival and allow the cold chill of early spring one more go at London. Regulus was glad he had reminded Sirius to take his jacket with him earlier. Lightly he shook his head. What did it matter if his brother was cold? If anyone deserved to shiver it was—

"—Sirius?"

"Huh?" Regulus snapped back into reality just in time to stop his cigarette from slipping from his loose grasp and burning a hole through his pant leg, and also to turn his gaze over to his cousin.

Rabastan rolled his eyes. "I asked you where that traitor of yours is hiding. I assumed you wouldn't have dared to invite me over if he were home somewhere," he said, shaking his fingers through his sienna bangs, sweeping them in and out of his shining eyes.

"He's gone…out."

"To meet with the Order?" demanded Rabastan almost immediately. He perked up immensely and was now staring intently at Regulus, who drew back a little.

"Just…with his friends," Regulus muttered, looking down. Rabastan sat back a little, disappointed.

Regulus took a long drag on his cigarette to help bring back his nerves. "Where did you hear about that, anyway?" he queried.

Rabastan lay back on the concrete, staring blankly at the underside of the balcony on the next floor up. "I heard it."

"From who?" asked Regulus. "I thought Rodolphus was trying to keep you out of the war as long as possible?"

Rabastan bristled and threw his cigarette in a high arc out into the lawn. "Yes he is, the fucking prick."

Regulus drew his wand and sent a small stream of water cascading onto the cigarette butt Rabastan had been too apathetic to put out before chucking.

"He seems to just want to keep you safe," he said in a small voice, halfway hoping his cousin might not hear.

Rabastan scoffed loudly. "No, don't give him so much credit, Reg. He just wants all the glory for himself. Mother and Father are so very proud of him." He rolled onto his side to face Regulus. "It was Bellatrix who told me about the Order, and how the Dark Lord'll soon be picking them off one by one." He laughed, closing his eyes briefly.

"Bellatrix…" Regulus ground his cigarette into the concrete by his side, now disgusted with the taste of it.

"Want another?" asked Rabastan, holding up their final cigarette. "Got one left."

"You can have it," Regulus conceded. "Those things are vile anyway." Besides, if he smoked anymore of them Regulus thought he might not be able to hide the smell. Minor drinking at their family's soiree had been one thing, but he felt Sirius might react a little differently where the process of wrapping carcinogens in paper, shoving them into one's mouth and setting fire to the other end was concerned.

"I can't fucking believe Rodolphus is helping you get in with the Dark Lord," said Rabastan bitterly as he lit up the last cigarette.

A sickening feeling was swirling about in Regulus's stomach, and at Rabastan's words it began to grow.

"I haven't interacted with him at all…I doubt Rodolphus has even said anything to him. He'd probably waiting for me to give him some actual information first before mentioning me to the Dark Lord. He wouldn't want to look like an idiot by building me up and then I fail to deliver…"

Rabastan gave Regulus an incredulous look. "Reg," he said, straightening up. "You think this whole thing was Rodolphus's idea? God no, _He_ asked him to contact you. Don't be stupid."

"What?" Regulus exclaimed in a voice a little too high pitched for his liking. "I mean…I thought it was just an offer…you know, something to think about. Not that I would consider _not_ doing it," he added hastily upon seeing Rabastan's dangerous look. "I just…didn't realize, I mean…I don't know."

"Whatever," said Rabastan, settling back down. "Just…_fuck_ you're lucky. You must be the youngest person working for Him. You'd better put in a good word for me."

Regulus shifted uneasily. "It's not like I'm going to _meet_ with Him. Rodolphus will do that, he's the intermediary…"

"Don't talk like that," said Rabastan in a much kinder voice. "You'll be welcomed with open arms and attending meetings before you know it. You could probably get Rodolphus to teach you to apparate early. Hey…how much time do we have before your brother gets back? I don't want to run into him."

"No, I don't want you to, either," Regulus admitted. He stood up and led Rabastan back inside.

"Next time I'll bring Antonin and maybe Lucius and Cissa. We'd have a lot more fun with them around."

"Yes, yes, I'll write you later."

"Don't forget to try and get some useful info from your idiot brother. The better standing you have with the Dark Lord the more seriously he'll take the good things you say about me!"

Shakily, Regulus pulled a short letter out of his jeans pocket. "Here," he held it out to his cousin, willing him to take it before he lost his nerve. "Just…take this to your brother, okay?"

"What is it? I thought you said you didn't have anything for him yet. Isn't Sirius just out drinking or some shit?"

"_No," _Regulus hissed. "He's at Dumbledore's brother's house. They're having some kind of meeting. This is everything I was able to get out of him before they left."

"Why did you lie to me earlier—?"

"Just take it to Rodolphus, okay?" Regulus pushed Rabastan out the front door. "If you need money for the Knight Bus, I can get you some."

"I have plenty, thanks. Regulus, can I read this first?"

"Do whatever you want, Rab, just get it to him," Regulus tried desperately to hide the tremor in his voice.

_The Dark Lord had asked for him specifically. How could he _already_ be on the man's radar? _

"Thanks, Reg."

"Yes, well goodbye," Regulus shut the door in Rabastan's face and locked it. Sirius had his keys, didn't he? Yes, he did, of course he did. Regulus shook his head and hurried to his bedroom. He slid off his shoes but curled up into bed with his day clothes on, too nervous and preoccupied to think about changing.

Was it all nervousness, though? No, a part of him was giddy. _The Dark Lord knew of him already._ He was wanted, needed, _requested…_more important than Sirius _ever_ was.

Regulus pulled his arms tight around his chest and thought with vindication about Sirius. He imagined how hurt Sirius would be when the doors of his Order's little clubhouse were broken down and a half dozen loyal followers of the Dark Lord tore apart everything he cared about.

_Then we will be even._

When Sirius quietly fumbled the locked door open and guided himself through the dark apartment quietly, Regulus was just falling asleep. Sirius turned on the bare minimum amount of lights in the kitchen to locate whatever food Regulus had left out for him.

_Then we will be the same. _

When he had eaten the (delicious) re-heated white rice and sautéed mushrooms, Sirius crept into the bedroom. He squinted in the darkness, and by the light of the moon from the window, could just make out the reassuring shape that was his little brother curled up in bed.

_I cannot pull myself up, and so instead I will have to drag you down. _


	5. Birthday Decisions

**You thought I was dead, didn't you? Well I was close, I'll admit it, but now that I have a new computer things don't look quite so bleak. **

**This is short because the other half was lost in the Great Laptop Conflagration, as I am now calling it, and as such there will be another chapter of about equal shortness to follow quickly. Maybe I'll combine them later into the one chapter they were meant to be…or not. Who the hell knows…**

* * *

Regulus felt sick to his stomach the next morning as he dredged himself out of bed. He could barely stumble to his feet; he felt like he was going to throw up. With shaky hands, he steadied himself against the headboard of his new bed.

It was while hunkered against the wood that he noticed he was wearing his pajamas. Straightening up, he frowned, clearly remembering passing out in jeans and a t-shirt.

"Good morning, Reggie," Sirius said quietly, opening the door and coming into the room. He was already dressed and by the tasty smell that followed him, had been cooking breakfast as well.

"Did you do this?" Regulus demanded, pointing at himself.

Sirius blinked. "You fell asleep in your day clothes," he admitted.

"So you…you…" Regulus wanted to shudder. The very idea that Sirius seemed to be more than comfortable stripping his unconscious body was not sitting well with him. "You just decided to…"

Sirius laughed. "Oh calm down, Reggie, it's not as if you were naked." He winked. "And even if you were, it's not like I haven't seen it all before; we used to take baths together every night, remember?"

Regulus rubbed tiredly at his head; he seemed to be getting a headache as well, although it was impossible to tell if it was for the same reasons his stomach felt like doing somersaults or simply because of _Sirius._

"Yes when we were four," he growled. Sirius only smirked in that infuriating way.

"Dad used to magic the bubbles different colors and splash us with the water," said Sirius pensively. "Do you remember? He was always soaked by the end, too," he added.

Regulus was quiet.

Sirius let out a small, disbelieving laugh. "It's hard to imagine that he was once that kind of person. I wonder what happened?"

Regulus's eyes narrowed.

"_You_ happened, Sirius," he answered.

Sirius looked up at him. Suddenly he didn't feel much like carrying on this particular conversation. "Happy Birthday, Reg," he whispered suddenly, grabbing his brother gently by the arm and leading him from the room. "I made you your favorite breakfast."

Regulus allowed himself to be led.

"My favorite breakfast?" questioned Regulus in genuine confusion. "I don't recall having a favorite—oh, look…waffles."

"I bought cinnamon," Sirius pointed out. He held out the shaker with enthusiasm but also a nervous look on his face, like he was frightened of Regulus's impending disapproval.

Regulus took the shaker. "Thank you, Sirius," he said in a neutral voice. He turned to start dishing up. With his brother behind him, he allowed himself to smile. The smell of food was actually doing wonders for his stomach and head, contrary to what he had thought.

"You didn't have to go to all this trouble, Sirius," he murmured. He glanced to his right and immediately noticed an array of decorations covering the dining room. There was a small pile of presents situated neatly on the table as well as a cake sitting under a protective glass dome. Regulus meandered over to the dining table with a waffle in his hand and commented again quietly, "you really didn't have to."

Sirius leaned energetically on the counter while Regulus ate. "Yeah, well, James baked the cake for me last night because he thought I might burn the house down with you inside and that would be an awful fourteenth birthday gift. Well actually it was Remus who thought that but he can't bake so he told James to do it last night when we were done with our meeting. He was up until two, you know, and I went over and got it from him about an hour ago and—"

Sirius chatted on for a very long time, talking really fast. Regulus sat down and admired the six gifts in front of him.

"Did Mother and Father send me anything?" he asked softly.

Sirius's monologue stopped dead at his brother's question. "No…" he said. "But I got you three, and Remus sent you a gift from him, Lily, and James…I think he picked it out and they just put their names on it…and there's one from the Malfoys and one from the Lestranges as well!"

Regulus nodded. "Did they…did they really not send me anything or are you simply refusing to give it to me?"

Sirius looked extremely hurt. "I wouldn't do that," he insisted, sitting down next to his brother. "Why would you think I would?"

Regulus shrugged. "You seemed so keen on cutting me off from them completely. I wouldn't have put it past you."

"I don't want you living with them anymore, Regulus, because they're deplorable parents, okay? There's a difference."

Regulus raised an eyebrow. "Because you, the immature, attention-seeking, teenage runaway, can do such a better job?"

"Yes," said Sirius aggressively. Then he added in a calmer tone. "You're in a pretty bad mood for someone who's having a birthday."

Regulus frowned. Sirius leaned forward and ruffled his hair. _Actually_. Fucking. Touched. Him. Regulus shivered.

"But I'll let it slide, because you never were a morning person. Here," Sirius pushed one of Regulus's presents to him. "Open it, it's from me!"

Regulus stared.

"Oh, come on, Reggie, open it! I think you'll really like it…_please_, I was up at five getting everything ready. I almost took my eye out curling the wrapping ribbon with the scissors…"

Sirius was awfully close to him, their chairs couldn't be more than a foot apart, and Regulus's scalp was still tingling where Sirius's hand had touched him. He wasn't used to this much attention or (frankly deranged) affection from anyone, much less Sirius. He didn't really know how to handle it. His skin felt clammy and suddenly he really wanted to take a shower.

Regulus gently pried the wrapping paper off the box, wishing his brother would stop staring. Sirius had never been this interested in him even before he'd started school; it was weird.

Sirius's first present to Regulus was an empty picture frame. It was an almost translucent silver with a rearing greyhound embossed in each corner. It felt heavy in Regulus's hands, and looked handmade, a sign of how much it must have cost.

"Are you trying to buy me with expensive, rectangular pieces of metal?" asked Regulus dryly, not altogether too impressed with his present.

Sirius bit his lip. "No, really that's not it. I bought it because you always liked silver, and because the greyhounds were our family's symbol."

Regulus raised an eyebrow, unwilling to believe that Sirius had willingly spent money on anything even coincidentally related to the Black family, but his comment about silver had rung startlingly true.

"When did I ever say I liked silver? My favorite color is purple."

"I know that's what you always say, but you're always wearing silver necklaces and your shelves back home were always covered with silver trinkets… and you got that silver earring…"

Regulus gasped and Sirius smiled. Regulus's hand flew unconsciously to his ear where near the very top a small, silver stud lay concealed by his lengthening hair. Being under seventeen, he had had done it himself several months previous, a short while after it had become conclusively apparent that Sirius was never returning home. His mother and father had never seen it.

"How did you know that was there?" he demanded in an unsteady voice.

"The second night you were here," Sirius explained. "You rolled into me and damn near cut my eye out with it. I'm surprised Father would let you wear such a thing."

"Dad doesn't know," Regulus whispered automatically.

Sirius frowned. "Does Mom?"

Regulus shook his head.

"Then if neither of them took you to a parlor, how did you get it done?"

"I stabbed myself through with a safety pin," said Regulus proudly. "Then I gauged it with a crochet needle."

Sirius visibly winced. "And here I was thinking Mom and Dad had lost their edge and were allowing their golden boy to run around looking like a common punk."

Regulus growled. Sirius reached out and smoothed his hair back, examining his earring more closely. Regulus winced.

"I do wish you'd gone to someone who knew what they were doing, though, Regulus. You could have seriously hurt yourself stabbing through your cartilage like that…"

Regulus shook himself from Sirius's grasp. "Whatever," he said. "The earring's silver, the frame is silver, what a marvelous world."

Sirius quieted down. "Here," he pushed another box to Regulus. "This one's from me also."

This present was considerably lighter. It almost felt like the box was entirely empty, but in the end it contained a photograph. Regulus held the picture in his hands for a very long time before he looked up at Sirius.

"Dad had this photograph taken for me nearly six years ago…"

"Because you were sad that I was leaving for school without you, so he had the best photographer in London come to the house and shoot a picture of us together so you wouldn't be so lonely when I was gone."

"And then the picture disappeared from my room several years ago," said Regulus through gritted teeth.

The older Black looked down briefly. "I took it from your drawer," he admitted. "I didn't have any pictures of us and I thought you hated me anyway."

Regulus swallowed thickly. "Whatever…"

Sirius continued on bravely. If he didn't say everything now, then he never would. "So what I'm saying is, even though it might not really mean as much to you anymore, this photo was important to you when you were younger and I never should have taken it from you, and I'm sorry, Regulus."

Sirius gently took the photo from his brother and slid it into the frame. An eleven year-old Sirius stood side by side with his younger brother, not quite touching, but comfortably close.

"There," he said, turning the frame up to face Regulus so he could look. "See?"

"Yes, I see. Forgive me for not being more enthused by my stolen childhood photograph being returned to me disguised as a birthday gift…"

Sirius bit his lip and set the frame back on the table where it was semi-concealed by discarded wrapping paper. "Right, well…I also bought you something else, I—"

Regulus shook his head and grabbed for his other two gifts. Narcissa and Lucius had sent him an uninteresting set of genealogy books, and he got midway through tearing the paper off the Lestranges' before he stopped.

Sirius was staring at him a little sheepishly, and Regulus was suddenly uncertain if he wanted his brother to see whatever Rodolphus, Bellatrix, and Rabastan had sent him. He tried to calm himself. They knew he was staying with Sirius, they would know better than to send anything damning…

…it was only a new set of school reference books. He needn't have worried. Practically sighing with relief, Regulus opened the accompanying card and immediately felt his breath catch in his throat.

_Regulus,_

_Sorry for the boring fucking present. Bella insisted. I do have some good news, though. Everyone's getting together in a couple of weeks and you and I have both been invited as well! Rodolphus is so pleased with you. Honestly I think he's getting a disproportionate amount of good fortune from your hard work but whatever, he says you're doing really well, and that if you can manage to get us an advance date in time for the meeting you can tell it to everyone in person. You're going to be the man of the hour, you know, I'm insanely jealous already. _

_I'll let you know the exact date in person sometime soon. The perils of the postal service, you know?_

_Happy Birthday_

_-Rabastan _

Regulus folded the card and shoved it hard back into its envelope, which he then set in his lap. Ambiguous word choice or not, there was no mistaking Rabastan's message. He and Regulus had been invited to tag along to a meeting with the Dark Lord, and in just a couple of weeks. That was so soon! Regulus's breathing quickened. What if he was expected to officially join at this meeting? Had Rodolphus already agreed for him? What would happen if he said no, or asked for more time?

Then he'd be in serious trouble, most likely. Was he already too far in to back-peddle? With dread, Regulus looked into his brother's smiling, oblivious face. Would Sirius help him out of this? More importantly, could Sirius forgive him his earlier deceptions? Was he worth it to Sirius to be kept safe?

Of course not. Sirius had ignored him for three _years_ after he'd had the audacity to become a Slytherin. If Regulus admitted he'd been passing information to Voldemort, Sirius would have him locked away for the rest of his _life._

"You still have one more gift from me, Reg," Sirius said, smiling. "Here, open it."

Regulus did what he could to steady his hands. Nervously he scratched off the wrapping paper to reveal the small, paperback novel within.

"A good, old-fashioned murder mystery," said Sirius enthusiastically. "Just the way you always used to like!" There was a definite quiver in his voice, however, that was practically screaming _and just the way I so very much hope you STILL enjoy. _

Regulus turned the story book over and over in his hands. What wouldn't he have given to have opened a gift like this from his big brother a year ago? Or any present at all for that matter? Even as recent as last Christmas or New Year's he would have been excited…

Three thoughtful presents from Sirius for three missed holidays.

Regulus looked back at Sirius. As belated as it was, no one had ever made anything up to him before.

"Thank you, Sirius, I'm sure I'll really like it," there was just no way this could be real. What on earth did Sirius want from him? What was he trying to prove? Regulus closed his eyes. Sirius had successfully stolen him from their parents; the Black family was without an heir, hadn't he gotten his revenge? He had fully expected to be pushed off to the side the moment Sirius bored of him, yet here he was, being given presents, cake, and an awful lot of attention.

"I don't have anything planned today," Sirius continued. "So I thought we could do whatever you wanted to do, if you can think of anything you'd like…"

"I want to go hiking in the mountains," said Regulus quickly. So quickly he surprised even himself. "Where Uncle Alphard took us six summers ago…And I want to sleep outside."

Sirius blinked.

"Okay," he said. "We'll go. I'll start some water bottles freezing right now and get us a few backpacks ready. Be sure you grab a jacket, okay? It still gets a little cold in the evenings…"

Sirius seemed to like Regulus's suggestion. He leaned over to give his brother a hug and then stood up and set off to prepare everything. Regulus threw his head into his hands and moaned softly. He felt sicker than ever.

Why was everything such a mess? He wanted to tell Sirius the whole fucking story. He wanted to beg for forgiveness and a second (or was this his third?) chance, but he was too scared Sirius would turn him down. Have him shipped off to prison, or send him back home, and if he had no information for the Dark Lord when they met he might be killed.

If he didn't show up for the meeting at all he was in likely the same scenario.

Regulus barely managed to scramble from his chair and rush down the hallway in time to throw up violently in the bathroom sink. Sweating and shaking he stared at himself in the mirror. It was not a face he wanted to look at.

_Deep breaths,_ Regulus told himself. Maybe there'd be an awfully hungry wolf in the woods that night who could kindly finish him off.

Twenty minutes later, Sirius slung a magically lightened backpack over his shoulder and held an identical one out to Regulus. "Ready to go?" he asked. "I'll apparate us to the start of the trail, and if we walk fast, we can make it to the top of the hills by mid-afternoon and have the rest of the day to relax up there…are you sure you're really okay? You still look awfully pale-I mean more pale than is usual..."

Regulus nodded.

"All right," Sirius conceded. "But I've got some first aid stuff with me just in case. I don't want you getting sick…and we can always use the tent if it gets too cold—"

"Sirius, I saw you pack half the fucking bathroom cabinet, I'll be fine, and I want to sleep outside somewhere where I can actually breath, that's the point."

"Well all right…if you're positive."

Regulus rolled his eyes and slipped his hand willingly into Sirius's. "My birthday," he reminded him.

"Okay," said Sirius softly, and with a loud bang he apparated them to that same quiet wilderness they had once visited, and for all intents and purposes, to that same quiet past…if only for a day.


End file.
